How to Raise Successful Kittens
Hey all you parents out there -
We know you are concerned about how your kittens will succeed in this uncertain economy. So , we are here to give some basic tips, that will help you in your quest to Raise Successful Kittens!
- Forget about college - teach your kittens CUTENESS! According to famous psychologist Jordan Caterson, the best gift you can give your kittens it to make them irresistibly CUTE. Obliterate humans with the CUTE-ray, scramble their brains with weaponized ADORABLENESS. They will never know what hit them - they will give up their entire house, furniture and sleep schedule to make your kittens happy.
- Hunting. Don't let your kittens get fat and lazy off cat food. Teach them some life skills. You never know when you will need to grab a bird from a back yard. Make hunting fun and they will always remember it fondly.
- Teach them the TRUTH about dogs. Dogs are not our friends, no matter how nice they appear to be. Humans have a tendency to favor dogs, and there's a lot of rubbish out there about how dogs and cats can be buddies - make sure your kittens the basics: Dogs drool, cats rule!